Grey's Anatomy  

 

美國醫生的笑話 

 

這真是太好笑了!!

但不要太認真,就笑話而已嘛!

 

我們台灣的醫生嗎??

每一位都很很棒啊!! 真的!!

 

 

<美國醫生笑話>

http://lilyfishyfish.pixnet.net/blog/3

 

米國醫生在醫院常常會互糗對方
這些是我常常聽到的笑話 XD

大家看看就好,
不要太認真 XD

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How do you hide a $100 dollar bill from a general surgeon?
(
你要如何從一般外科醫生那裡把100元鈔票藏起來?)
Just put it in the patient’s notes.
(
放在病人的病歷裡就好了)

How do you hide a $100 dollar bill from an orthopedic surgeon?
(
你要如何從骨科醫生那裡把100元鈔票藏起來?)
Just put it in a textbook.
(
放在醫學課本裡面就好了)

How do you hide a $100 bill from a CT surgeon?
(
你要如何從胸腔外科醫生那裡把100元鈔票藏起來?)
Just paste it to their kid's forehead. He will never see it.
(
黏在他小孩的額頭上。他絕對不會發現的)

How do you hide a $100 dollar bill from a plastic surgeon?
(
你要如何從整形醫生那裡把100元鈔票藏起來?)
It's a trick question. You can't.
(
不好意思,辦不到)

How do you hide a $100 from a radiologist?
(
你要如何從放射科醫生那裡把100元鈔票藏起來?)
Put it on the patient.
(
放在病人身上)

How do you hide a $100 from an internist?
(
你要如何從內科醫生那裡把100元鈔票藏起來?)
Easy, just put it under a dressing.
(
很簡單,放在繃帶下)

what do you call 2 medical students looking at a EKG?
(
兩個醫學生一起看心電圖叫作什麼?) 
a double blind study
(
雙盲研究)

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

knows everything, does nothing
(
什麼都知道,什麼都不做)
Neurologist
(
神經科醫生)

knows nothing, does everything
(
什麼都不知道,什麼都做)
Surgeon 
(
外科醫生)

knows nothing, does nothing
(
什麼都不知道,什麼都不做)
Psychiatrist
(
精神科醫師)

knows everything, does everything but too late
(
什麼都知道,儘管全都做了但為時已晚)
A pathologist
(
病理醫生)

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A medical student, family doctor, an internist, a surgeon and a pathologist go duck hunting. 
(
一個醫學生,一個家庭醫生,一個內科醫生,一個外科醫生,還有一個病理醫生一起去打獵)

The medical student is the first to raise his shotgun, but unable to tell if the duck is really a duck, he does not shoot.
(
醫學生是第一個舉起獵槍的,但是他沒有開槍.. 因為他無法分別那是否真的是一隻鴨子)

The family doctor goes "here's a bird", shoots, kills. He concludes "it looked like a duck, sounded like a duck, was killed by duck shot, it was a duck!". 
(
家庭醫生說: “這是鳥科類的動物,冷靜開槍,殺了動物。他做了結論: “他看起來像隻鴨子,聽起來像隻鴨子,又被我一槍殺了,他一定是隻鴨。” )

The internist points his gun, but does not shoot. "This probable bird certainly looks like a female mallard, but I must be sure of what I am killing before shooting. A juvenile Mesopotamian sea duck would look exactly the same!". 
(
內科醫生舉起了獵槍,但是他沒有開槍. “這個鳥科動物看起來很像母姓綠頭鴨,可是我一定要完全確定後才能開槍,因為幼年的美索不達米亞海鴨有可能看起來跟這隻一模一樣!” )

The surgeon goes "look, it flies! Boom", then turns to the pathologist and asks "So, what was it?".
(
外科醫生大喊: “大家看,有東西在飛! !! ” 然後轉身跟身邊的病理醫生說 : “你幫我看看,那到底是啥玩意兒?”)

 

 

 

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